The world can be a cruel place and once I got home I bid it adieu and yelled "See you tomorrow" with as much disdain my flustered and tired body could produce as I dead bolted the door. Feeling safe and secure I grumbled a few more words and immediately felt the presence of the Spirit.
"You have shamed the name of the LORD." Truth be told, the voice was speaking to me all the day long. It was then that my anger and frustration subsided enough for me to care. (Honesty is the only way to put forth these words).
How could I become so insolent and vengeful and still cal upon God and Jesus to help me? I could not. Early on in the day my heart was set (by me) to be rebellious. For some reason I, (dangerous word) felt justified with how I was behaving. Once I was alone with the Spirit and away from the environment feeding my dark and sinful nature, all had dawned on me.
Recollecting the words spoken to King Belshazzar in Daniel 5:27 "Tekel; thou art weighed in the balance and are found to be wanting (deficient). Great difficulty followed as I tried to seek the Lord's forgiveness. My stubborn spirit was hindering me. Satan had gotten a foothold into me and I could not shut the door.
Nearly two hours passed before I was able to enter into the presence of the Most High. A flood of peaceful tranquility filled me. Jehovah was near. At this point I only asked one thing. "Forgive me?" Feeling the regenerative powers of His restoration and cleansing, the Spirit of God leads me to Luke 10.
Jesus was in the home of Mary, Martha and Lazarus. Martha was fussing about and trying to prepare a meal and other things and requested Jesus tell her sister Mary to help, (verse 40, Lord do you not care that my sister has left me to work alone? Tell her to help.) But Jesus did the opposite. He said to Martha, "You are worried and troubled about many things. Mary has chosen to do the right thing and sit at my feet in my presence."
Why must I most of the time go through the anguish and frustration of another day before I realize that at any moment in the day I could simply just go sit in the presence of my Lord and be at rest, just like Mary did?