The next few blog posts will be about changes and how we are affected by them. It will consist of three parts and three people. People at different points in life and where one life ends and another one begins.
Life is full of change.
One of my biggest fears in life is change. Why? I'm not to sure really. As I look around me many changes are taking place. Summer has given way to the fall season and we will soon head into winter.
The leaves on the trees transition from life to death because they die and fall off. And if one really thinks about what change is all about, it is end of one thing and the beginning of another.
Over these past few months I have experienced many periods of change and I must say I fought tooth and nail to not let it happen. Once again, why?
My track record bears witness to my reluctance of the inevitable. Music is a big part of my life. Not so much now as it was before. I remember when Cd's were first 'forced onto us.' It took me a couple of years before I would even buy a CD. Cassettes were the norm for me and I did not want them to go away. Almost everyday I would picket the music stores and tell the inbound buyers, "Cd's are just a fad and they will go the way of the dinosaur in a year or two. Just wait and see." As we all know, I was wrong and Cd's flourished and continue to sell even in today's wireless age. Let me add, the first cassette I bought was U2's "WAR" and I loved it. What could the CD offer that would make me turn on an my old friend the cassette? Nothing. I was very adamant about that. When it dawned on me that the people would buy Cd's despite my protests, and very sore vocal chords, I decided to give up. I was convinced the downfall of society was soon to follow. Needless to say, a couple of months later I broke down and purchased a Cd. Which one? U2's War once again. I was blown away. The clarity and sound was amazing. And best of all? You could go directly to a song, any song and listen to it. No fast forwarding and rewinding. No tapes breaking in the radio or cassette player. Embrace it I did not, but I was warming up to the idea of Cd's.
Why the hesitation to move forward? In short, FEAR.
Fear gripped me when I was let go from my job of almost ten years. Why? I had grown comfortable there and I knew what to expect everyday almost. I knew the people and they knew me and I was respected. It was a way of life for me. Change meant starting over and I did not want to. Moses is a good example of this in Exodus chapters 3-4. Moses is on the backside of the desert and tending sheep for his father-in-law Jethro. It says of Moses in chapter 2 verse 21 "And Moses was content to dwell with the man: and he (Jethro) gave Moses his daughter Zipporah his daughter (to marry). For fourty years Moses hid there. I say hid there because Moses had killed an Egyptian and was in fear of being found. After while Moses' family grew to include two sons and much responsibility within the land. Until.....he saw the burning bush. During this time with God, Moses was told to go back to Egypt and free His people. Moses thinking of himself and his past troubles tries to get out of it. But after going back and forth with God to no avail it says in chapter 4 verse 14a "And the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses."
Moses feared change. He had grown comfortable and content in the desert and only did what he wanted to do, with very few responsibilities and accountable only to Jethro. Not so with Jehovah God. It is when we get comfortable and content that we often forget we are called to serve the MOST HIGH. Moses knew of his brethren in bondage and still he wanted to stay where he was. He did not want to face his past life and deal with the issues that he left behind, but never dealt with.
My season of transition was much like the one with Moses. I to had issues I needed to deal with and "hiding in the desert" was not going to make them go away. If I was to move forward with God and what he has called me to do, then I needed to lay to rest my past once and for all. I needed to take responsibility and be accountable for what I had done. Moses saw this and when he accepted it and dealt with it, then and only then could God use him. And we know that God most certainly did use Moses to do great and wonderful things.
Change is not easy because we are going into the unknown and it makes many people uncomfortable and fearful. Some are encouraged by change. Not so with me. However, I was not seeing it from God's perspective. The Greater perspective.
I know God is in control and nothing happens without HIS permission. So now I embrace change and have come to realize, it is not so bad.